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Tag: New York Yankees

Blogs

Sep 7, 2012

Scorecard Memory: UFO Sighting and Roy White on the Phone

Sheriff Tom goes back to April 24, 1996 in Section 39 of Yankee Stadium for a Yankees-Indians game.

This is a recurring series of recollections, where I will be marching though my old scorecards from my halcyon days in good old Section 39 of the Yankee Stadium bleachers. You’re invited to join me. Please bring beer.

April 24, 1996: Yankees host the Cleveland Indians.

A Wednesday night affair at the Stadium, one of those comic 10-8 games that featured balls bounding down both lines, walks galore, and more mosh-pit celebrations in Section 39 celebrating deep Yankees tags. Be that as it may, we could not combat what they had going on that night in Detroit, where the Twins were pounding the Tigers 24-11 (or I should say the Vikings were beating up the Lions, apparently) as we watched that score flip around on the scoreboard like the National Debt Clock and laughed all night.

I had come walking in with my headphones and a wee one named Christina immediately accosted me and wanted to listen. I’m guessing she was somewhere around five years old at the time. I had some 80’s thrash metal in there, a folk/pagan metal act named Skyclad. I put the phones on her ear and before I was able to lower the volume she pushed play and the music screeched and bleated. I expected her to shy away at best, to throw the headphones in horror at worst, but she ended up listening to that damn cassette tape until the batteries ran out a couple of innings and hours later. To this day, even without seeing this note on the scorecard I could never play that band again without thinking of that kid and that night she commandeered my Walkman.

It was a night for enterprising by creative fans. First some fans set up a “K Corner” off the loge for Scott Kamieniecki of all people. Always a fan favorite, Kammy ended up leaving the game in the sixth with a whopping two Ks tacked to the wall, so there wasn’t much return on that investment. Yet some more fans that wanted in on the action had made a sign for Paul O’Neill, each of them holding up a letter of his last name … on loose leaf paper! Are you kidding me? Yeah, that will stand out from the batter’s box. Someone in tribute to this lackluster effort drew a tiny circle on my scorecard and promptly held it aloft, stating that it was now a home run target of the magnitude of the mini O’Neill tribute out there.

There was this idiot out there nicknamed Bird, a lanky guy that would shuffle around and annoy any and all. He was walking around with Slim Jims, offering them out like anyone would want them. Here’s something weird on here (aside from creepy Bird) … a UFO sighting at 9:19 p.m.! No, it was not yet another home run given up by John Wetteland. It was a mysterious hovering light overhead that was zipping about in a seeming trajectory that no plane, blimp or copter could do in our thinking. Nothing else came out of this big UFO news aside from a note in the margin of my scorecard that night that we saw it. For the record, I was never privy to another “UFO sighting” out there, in all my 600 games or 6,000 beers.

In the fourth inning, Tino Martinez clouted his first home run in Yankee pinstripes, setting off another pile-on out there in the bleachers. I don’t know what was taking security so long to put a stop to this dangerous endeavor. I mentioned current Cowbell Man Milton was flying all over the place, and I also mentioned that Gang Bang Steve once again ended up on the very bottom each and every time.

This is funny. That relic Dennis Martinez started for the Tribe and got the old heave-ho in the fourth for arguing balls and strikes. He was not long for the ballgame regardless, as before he left the mound he was tagged for seven runs and probably was looking to go out with a bang. He ended up leaving, an ejected man, to a savage chorus of boos. It was always fun to show the old-timers respect!

Ah, I see this was the night I actually spoke to Yankees legend Roy White on the phone from my bleacher seat. As alluded to on here before, a bleacher elder had something going with him, which seemingly everyone knew about but me. Well, at one point this now somewhat-forgotten woman walked up to me out of the blue and told me Roy White was on the horn, and I could say hello. I exchanged a few pleasantries, none of which I remember beyond referring to him a few times as Mr. White and him never telling me I could just call him Roy.

A couple of random musings on here. A tune from A Flock of Seagulls was blared over the sound system, causing a “What is this, 1982?” snarl. Some guy was wearing such a large and clunky hat he was promptly dubbed “Pepperoni Pizza Box Head.” There’s a mention that pro wrestling’s “The Giant” had won the WCW World Heavyweight Championship a few days before (he competes to this day as “The Big Show”). There was apparently a “box seats-bleachers altercation,” but sadly no further details. We even engaged in a pleasant conversation on how odd it was that after all the hoopla we had seen in previous seasons to this regard, not one person had been seen by any of us running on the field at Yankee Stadium so far that year.

Devils fan Billy (famous for once calling the Twins’ Marty Cordova “someone who would be remembered in time as the best left fielder of his generation”) was talking about the circus for whatever reason and someone snapped, “Why don’t you go back there with the rest of the clowns?” And speaking of clowns Gang Bang noted on the card I spent most of the game making funny clown faces at Christina. Hey, I was always good with kids out there, and she did have my headphones after all. I mentioned at one point that Steve “threw a cup,” but explained it away as simply “subterfuge,” which leads me to believe all these years later he was doing it to cover up for someone else at the time to keep them out of trouble.

Out on the field (speaking of clowns again) the Yankees pulled off a wild 10-8 win. Kammy got the win with a modicum of help from Jeff Nelson and John Wetteland, though they were both bopped around a bit. The Yankees had 13 hits, including pairs from Bernie Williams, Paul O’Neill, Ruben Sierra, Mariano Duncan and Derek Jeter. Tino drove in three on the night, and eight different Yankees scored a run. Your Yankees lineup was:

1. Wade Boggs, 3B
2. Bernie Williams, CF
3. Paul O’Neill, RF
4. Ruben Sierra, DH
5. Tino Martinez, 1B
6. Tim Raines, LF
7. Mariano Duncan, 2B
8. Joe Girardi, C
9. Derek Jeter, SS

On the Indians’ side of the ledger they mustered 11 hits with Yankee killer Manny Ramirez and Jim Thome each scoring three runs. Thome also drove in four, including a three-run jack. Omar Vizquel, of all people, also had a home run. After Martinez saved himself by getting the toss we were lucky to see Jim Poole, Eric Plunk and Paul Assenmacher  (whose last name Steve managed to morph into an obscene word on the pitching line) on the hill for the Tribesman. Your Indians lineup on the night, met with boos, went like this:

1. Kenny Lofton, CF
2. Julio Franco, 1B
3. Carlos Baerga, 2B
4. Albert Belle, LF
5. Eddie Murray, DH
6. Manny Ramirez, RF
7. Jim Thome, 3B
8. Sandy Alomar, C
9. Omar Vizquel, SS

Lets do a quick profile, and we’ll go with the aforementioned Mr. Dennis Martinez, affectionately referred to by many, but not me as “El Presidente.” Not like most of you need a reminding of him.

He was no Tippy Martinez, that was for sure. Anyway, he hung around from 1976-1998, pitching for Baltimore, Montreal, Cleveland (’94-96), Seattle and a wrap with the Braves. He won 245 games, so no joke there. He lost 193 games and had an impressive 3.70 ERA. He made 562 starts (692 games) and has a whopping 3,999 innings on his ledger. He walked 1,165 and whiffed 2,149, by far the highest totals of each in my dozens of profiles over time. Actually, I don’t think all of the pitcher totals I ever did added up to Martinez’s stats in that regard if you combined all of them together. I had always found him pedestrian, but he was a solid hand for a long time. He never won more than 16 games, but reached double digits in wins 15 times. He was one to remember. Born in 1955, this Nicaraguan was signed by the Orioles in 1973. His profile page on Baseball-Reference has 70, 949 views as of today, which seems sadly low. Cheers to Mr Martinez, may he enjoy his golden years, the jerk!

As for the game itself, only a ragtag group of 20,187 came out for this one, and the game dragged on for three hours and 37 minutes. I bet Michael Kay was mad. Hell, as games started after 7:30 at this time, I was probably mad too!  Your umpires on this cool evening (61 degrees apparently) were Gary Cederstrom (HP), Mike Reilly (1B),  Terry Craft (2B) and that moron Rich Garcia (3B). They were also booed.

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Blogs • Yankees

Sep 4, 2012

First Place Isn’t Supposed to Feel This Way

The Yankees’ 10-game lead is now a one-game lead, but the Yankees say they aren’t panicking. They are the only ones who aren’t.

I know that seasonal depression is a real thing because I’m pretty sure I have it. When I left Atlantic City on Sunday afternoon after a weekend with a group of guys that I see sparingly, including some I now see only once a year, it was on the train ride back when it really hit me: summer is over, and there’s no getting it back.

I spent the weekend drinking anything handed to me, inhaling second-hand smoke at the tables, sleeping in an overcrowded hotel room and trying to draft the perfect fantasy football team (which is the real reason we went to AC in the first place). But really what I was doing was attempting to be Billy Chapel in For Love of the Game and trying to “push the sun back up in the sky and give us one more day of summer.”

It seems like just yesterday I was in Nantucket for Figawi and Memorial Day weekend and in Boston for the Yankees-Red Sox series over Fourth of July weekend. Now it’s September 4, it’s getting cold at night and the Giants’ season begins on Wednesday night. Is this real life?

The end of summer is devastating, but it’s inevitable and because of that, it doesn’t come close to the level of devastation that the Yankees are putting me through as they are now one game away from erasing the 10-game lead they held on July 18. But when you combine the end of summer with the Yankees’ second-half slide, well I’m on the verge of spending the next six-plus months in my bed like Brian Wilson from the Beach Boys until Opening Day 2013.

How did we get here? The easy answer is injuries. Andy Pettitte broke his leg, CC Sabathia hit the disabled list twice, A-Rod missed over a month, Ivan Nova sucked before getting hurt, and Nick Swisher, Mark Teixeira, Curtis Granderson and now maybe Robinson Cano have missed time due to various injuries. Injuries is the easy answer, but it’s not the real answer. The real answer is that the Yankees have played bad baseball since the All-Star break, and that’s the real answer because if I cite injuries as the reason for nine games of their 10-game lead being erased then I’m no better than John Henry or Larry Lucchino or Bobby Valentine. I’m not going to use injuries as an excuse because that’s irresponsible and would make me unaccountable as a Yankee fan. Every team has injuries and no one cares about who is injured. People care about who wins.

The 2008 Yankees were a train wreck and that had a lot to do with injuries. But no one felt bad for them and in the long run, people will remember the 2008 Yankees as the first Yankees team to miss the postseason since 1993 rather than the team that had Darrell Rasner and Sidney Ponson start 40 games combined or the team that had Jose Molina play in 100 games or the team that actually picked up Richie Sexson and played him because things got so bad. No, people will just remember the 2008 Yankees as the team that failed.

The same goes for the 2012 Yankees. No one will care that the 2012 Yankees lost Michael Pineda without ever throwing a pitch, lost Mariano Rivera and Brett Gardner to season-ending injuries, only got nine starts out of Andy Pettitte until now or that a handful of other key guys missed significant time. All that matters is whether or not the Yankees make the postseason and what they do in the postseason.

With a one-game lead with 28 games to go (and a relatively easy schedule), the 2012 Yankees can become one of three things between now and the last out of Game 162.

1. They can hang on to win the the division and this column will have been a waste of my time writing and your time reading.

2. They can blow the division lead and play in Bud Selig’s one-game playoff, which will likely end with me being hooked up to a respirator.

3. They can blow the division lead and miss the one-game playoff, and I will take myself off the grid and go into hiding indefinitely.

After Monday’s loss, the Yankees were asked about whether or not they are panicking now that they are a loss and a Baltimore win on Tuesday away from not having sole possession of first place in the AL East anymore. Let’s take a look at what they had to say with my response to their explanation.

(Warning: Things said in this column might be irrational and unreasonable. That’s what happens when a 10-game lead becomes a one-game lead.)

“Who’s panicking? You? Are you panicking? How do you deal with panic? … I don’t panic. So I don’t have to deal with it. Everyone deals with it differently. But I’m not one to panic.” – Derek Jeter

Yes, I’m panicking. Yes, I also understand that Derek Jeter isn’t going to say that the sh-t has hit the fan and the Yankees are in trouble. This is the same guy who could lose his house and everything he owns in a hurricane and stand next to his destroyed home and tell you that everything is going to be fine. So while I want to believe Derek Jeter because I don’t know any other way, it’s really hard to believe him right now. I’m glad he doesn’t have to panic. I’m glad this is so easy for him.

“It’s not a good feeling. You lose some games, and you just want to win games. You don’t want to put your head down. Just got to turn the page. Just be ready for tomorrow. … It’s a little bit hard, but you don’t want to send negative messages to your brain. You’ve got to be positive and just mentally prepare for tomorrow.” – Robinson Cano

It’s Robbie Cano … sports psychologist … don’t ya know! I could get on Robinson Cano’s recent lack of hustling, but I won’t because that’s who Robinson Cano is. Instead let’s just go with who Robinson Cano isn’t: On July 18, the Yankees had a 10-game lead. On July 19, they lost the first game of a four-game sweep at the hands of the A’s. Since July 19, Cano is hitting .265/.335/.457 with seven home runs and 16 RBIs in 42 games. When exactly is “tomorrow” coming?

“See, I look at the positives, you know what I’m saying? Like I said before we even got into this month, we play everyone. So we’ve got to win games. That’s it. It doesn’t get any more complicated than that. … We beat some teams early on, right? Baseball’s a funny game, a funny sport. Sometimes you struggle a bit, and then all of a sudden, things seem to change and you roll off a lot of wins.” – Derek Jeter

The Yankees play the Rays the next two days and then they play the Orioles in a four-game series at Camden Yards. I want to think they will win all six games and go on the kind of run Derek Jeter thinks they can go on and this will all be a minor blip on the 2012 season. But if I can easily believe that then I should also believe that the money left under my pillow in exchange for a lost tooth came from someone other than my parents when I was younger.

“We all gotta’ do what we do. The way you come out of things like this is by doing the little things and if we focus on doing the little things and become master at those we don’t have to worry about big things. And hopefully we’re on our way. I think nobody’s panicking. We’ve done this for a long time.” – Alex Rodriguez

If the Yankees can master the little things then they won’t have to worry about big things? What the eff? How does no one follow this answer up with a question asking what any of this means?

“It’s baseball. We’ve got to go out and keep playing. It’s a tough game but we still have a lead. It’s all up to us and hopefully we can turn it around. … We’ve had some injuries. We’ve got some guys coming back. Hopefully that could give us a shot in the arm to be able to take off and start playing well. … Like I said, it’s up to us to go out and play well and I didn’t help us out today.” – CC Sabathia

Hey, it’s CC Sabathia making excuses! Don’t you just love the “We’ve had some injuries” thrown into the middle of his answer? At least he made up for it by finishing with “I didn’t help us out today” so he isn’t completely delusional like Ivan Nova at times this season and Ian Kennedy back in 2009.

I got scared when CC started this answer by saying “It’s baseball” and thought he might go off on a Tom Glavine 2007 rant about how baseball doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of life and that there are more important things to worry and care about. But CC Sabathia will make $23 million this season, so I’m glad he isn’t as stupid as Glavine was to go down that road.

It’s rare, very rare, that I recklessly throw out a “Ladies and gentlemen, CC Sabathia!” but I did it on Monday afternoon and I felt good after I did it. A lot of people went into Monday saying, “This is why the Yankees signed CC and re-signed him for all that money … to win games like this.” Well, he lost. He lost for the second time in as many starts since coming off the DL for the second time. Last Wednesday he blew two leads to the lowly Blue Jays and on Monday he blew a one-run lead to the Rays after just one shutdown inning following the Yankees taking a lead. We are CC Sabathia losing his next start away from me talking about how much money he makes per start the way I used to have to with A.J. Burnett.

“I thought the team played with some energy. Today was just a classic game of two great pitchers going at each other and we came up on the short end. But I feel if we play with that type of intensity it’s going to be a fun month of September.” – Alex Rodriguez

A “classic game” huh? I don’t even know what to say about that. And if the Yankees play the way they did on Monday, a game in which they lost, then how is September going to be fun at all?

“I’m always positive. That’s my personality. I’ve said it all along; these guys have found a way to get it done all year long through a lot of adversity, through a lot of injuries, through a lot of different things that we’ve been through. I believe they’re going to do it. That’s who they are and I believe in them.” – Joe Girardi

Joe Girardi lies a lot. We all know that. But this might be the biggest lie of them all. How have the Yankees handled adversity and their injuries well? They have all but erased their division lead, and as another part of adversity, they have won zero games when trailing after eight innings. The Yankees are supposed to be built on the notion that they are never out of a game and they will fight until the last out. But what good is fighting until the last out, if you never win the fight?

A wise man once said, “When you win the division, you don’t really care what you win by.” That wise man was Joe Girardi on Monday after the Yankees 4-3 loss to Tampa Bay, which cut their AL East lead to one game. You remember that lead, right? It was 10 games back on July 18. On Tuesday night it could be zero. I miss that 10-game lead and I miss summer.

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Blogs

Sep 4, 2012

The Trade-Off That Came True

The Red Sox blew up their team and entered into the “rebuilding” stage for what could be years to come. It might be all Mike Miccoli’s fault.

I don’t remember the exact state I was in the morning of Game 7 of the 2011 Stanley Cup Final between the Bruins and Canucks, but I’ll try to describe it as what it’s like to be a puppy that just heard thunder for the first time after drinking four Double Americanos. Needless to say, I was a nervous wreck. After playing 106 games that season, the Bruins’ chance at their first Cup in 39 years had come down to 60 minutes in an arena where they had sucked all series long. To borrow a phrase, this was not real life.

This led to a pretty telling Gchat conversation between Neil Keefe and I where the subject centered on what I’d trade in the sports world for a Bruins championship that night. Here’s the most important passage:

Neil: Red Sox don’t make the playoffs for the next 12 years, and the Yankees win five in a row in that span…would you trade it?


Me: Yep.

Neil: Damn.



Me: Didn’t even need to think about it.



Neil: That’s serious.

This, of course, came on June 15, 2011 when the Red Sox were 40-27 after winning nine of their last 10 games. Their .597 win percentage made them the best team in the American League.

You probably know what happens next. The Bruins go on to win Game 7, shutting out the Canucks on the road to win the Stanley Cup. The Red Sox win that night too, but go 50-45 the rest of the season, which includes an epic September collapse that causes them to miss the playoffs. 

More than a year after our conversation, Terry Francona, Theo Epstein, Kevin Youkilis, Josh Beckett, Carl Crawford and Adrian Gonzalez are all former Red Sox, while Bobby Valentine’s club sits 15 games out of first with a 62-74 record. Oh, and they were just outscored 330-5 (33-5 actually – it just seemed like 330) in a three-game sweep in Oakland over the weekend where almost every former Red Sox player did some damage against their former team.

Whoops.

This is all a very strange, maybe even funny, coincidence – at least, I keep telling myself that. I’ve fashioned myself as a ‘hockey-above-all-else’ fan first and foremost, with all sports falling into place thereafter. From the handful of people I’ve told about mine and Neil’s conversation, Bruins and Red Sox fans alike, I’ve gotten mixed responses. The night after the Bruins’ win, I remember two people telling me, “Nah, never happen with this year’s Sox.” Those same two people now send me the occasional, “I hate you” or “Hope you’re enjoying that Cup, douche” tweets and texts whenever something goes side-splittingly wrong for the Red Sox. I even had a co-worker tell me, in all seriousness, that I needed to “strongly reconsider my alignments” after the Red Sox collapsed last September against the Orioles. I avoided eye contact with them for the next few weeks.

You can only imagine what I was thinking about when the Red Sox dropped this bombshell of a trade on its fans. Curse reversed.

Personally, I love the deal. I love it because this team was unlike any other club from years past. The thing that the Red Sox needed the most was a reset, a clean slate to wipe away all of the BS that had been surrounding them for so long. This move was a step in the right direction, even if it means it’s going to feel like pre-2004 for the next few years.

Regardless of how you feel about the Red Sox, it’s hard to deny that the trade of Gonzalez, Crawford, Beckett and Nick Punto (who will no doubt become the answer to the trivia question, “Who was the fourth Red Sox player traded to the Dodgers in the 2012 Summer Blockbuster move?” in 10 years) to the Los Angeles Dodgers was a blockbuster. It was the most necessary move to get the Red Sox back on track for the upcoming years, purging over $275 million in sour contracts and stale players along the way. It also means that opposing teams will get to see a potential heart-of-the-order of Jacoby Ellsbury, Ryan Lavarnway and James Loney (a combined batting average of .241 between the three of them) for the remainder of the season. If this doesn’t scream “Hey! We give! We give! We’ll just start rebuilding now, OK?!” I don’t know what will.

And you know what? That’s fine.

The 2012 season was a lost cause for the Red Sox early on and everybody knew it. Plagued by injuries, leaks, a lack of effort and insufferable players, coaches, managers, owners, media members and fans, it became too easy to point fingers. In fact, all of the hype that was conjured up about this team after the 2010 offseason simplified it. I was drinking the same Kool-Aid as every other Red Sox fan, believing that yes, the 2011 club would be one of the best ever. Clearly, that wasn’t the case. The Dodgers trade serves as what should be the midway point to massive remake of the Red Sox. It also should have woken everyone up.

The expectations are being lowered for the Red Sox, as they should be. The once laughed-at “bridge year” idea that Epstein floated by Boston in 2009 seems reasonable for the immediate future pending any ridiculous moves this offseason. The Red Sox need to take a step backwards if they’re going to be a successful club in the future. In Boston, it needs to feel like 2003 again if there’s ever going to be another 2004 and that begins with churning out players who are easy to root for.

Want to know why everyone liked the 2004 Red Sox team so much? Because they worked their asses off. It was about baseball in the end – not contracts, not leaking things to the media, not about never giving 100-percent effort. Sure, there were big-name players on the roster, but it was always about putting the team first and the individual second. It’s part of the reason why guys like Trot Nixon, Bill Mueller and Kevin Millar were so crucial to the 2004 team’s success. It was never really about themselves. For the past few years, that same ideology became lost.

It was about Adrian Gonzalez citing “God’s plan” as an excuse for the Red Sox collapse last season and later blaming the Green Monster, an inanimate object, for his lack of power at Fenway Park.

It was about Carl Crawford deflecting post-game questions from the media regarding the team’s struggles to Jason Varitek (“Go ask the Captain”) and only being able to play on certain days due to his injuries.

It was about Josh Beckett and his 18 days off a year, his faded interest and baseball and (lest we forget) chicken and beer.

It was never about the Boston Red Sox as a whole, a unit, a team, as it was about themselves for these players. They had to go, every single one of them, if it meant putting this organization back on the right path.

It’s a lot easier to root for guys like Mauro Gomez, Pedro Ciriaco and Ryan Lavarnway right now because they’re competing for a spot next season. They haven’t grown complacent with the team, gotten comfortable and accepted their given roles with mediocre play and lousy attitudes. They want it.

The roster is filled with unknowns to the casual baseball fan, but maybe that’s for the best. Let’s weed out the pink hats and the jaded “first time/long time” fans whose day revolves around them bitching about the Red Sox on sports talk radio. While we’re at it, let’s rip apart the staged ‘sell-out’ streak and put a stop to singing “Sweet Caroline” when the Sox are getting blown out. Let’s get back to playing baseball.

There’s still a lot of work left to be done to salvage the Red Sox for the upcoming years. Bobby Valentine has become the Michael Scott of the Red Sox organization circa Season 1 of The Office (awkward, intolerable and sometimes the only reason to watch), while the ownership has matured to be far too problematic with their priorities lined up outside of Fenway Park. That’s just the beginning, of course, but it’s important to remember that it needed to get worse for the Red Sox before it got better.

According to my calculations, just 10 more years of bad luck for the team. At least there’s a new curse to reverse. Now about those World Series titles for the Yankees I agreed to…

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Blogs • Email Exchanges • Yankees

Aug 29, 2012

A State of Worry for the Yankees

The Yankees have basically played .500 baseball in the second half and the constant worrying about their division lead led to an email exchange with Jake Strasser of Barstool Sports.

On Wednesday, July 18, the Yankees finished a sweep of the Blue Jays with a 6-0 win at the Stadium and they finished the day with a 10-game lead in the division. Today their lead is 3 1/2 games.

The Yankees have gone 22-21 since the All-Star break and 18-20 since they held that 10-game lead on July 18. The injuries are mounting and now the team will enter September without Alex Rodriguez and Mark Teixeira in the lineup. I haven’t pulled the alarm yet on the 2012 Yankees and avoiding the one-game playoff, but I have shattered the glass and my hand is on the lever.

With constant worrying and scoreboard watching each day, I thought it would be a good idea to talk to someone who I know is going through the same thing. And that’s how this email exchange with Jake Strasser of Barstool Sports started.

Keefe: On Tuesday night, Steve Pearce hit fourth for the Yankees. Russell Martin hit fifth. If you didn’t watch the game, I could probably sell you on the idea that I hit sixth and the doorman in my apartment building hit seventh. That’s how bad things are right now for the Yankees due to injuries.

With A-Rod already out, Mark Teixeira went down on Monday night and Joe Girardi said he could be out “seven, eight or 15 days.” (The man who counted like that actually went to Northwestern University.) So yeah, if our starting pitching right now doesn’t do what Phil Hughes did on Tuesday night then it’s going to be really hard to win games. And if Rafael Soriano does what he did on Monday night it’s going to be even harder.

The reason the Yankees lost in five games to the Tigers last year was because of their hitting. Their pitching could have been better, but it was their hitting with runners in scoring position and the heart of the order that did them in. This year I’m scared that the same thing might happen. Actually I’m not scared … I’m petrified. And it’s not even the ALDS I’m scared of. It’s the one-game playoff. I have already been stocking up on bottled water, canned foods, flashlights and batteries in the event that the Yankees have to play in that one-game playoff.

It wasn’t too long ago that the Yankees had a comfortable 10-game lead in the division and I was laughing and watching games with a spring training mentality. Now with a month to go I feel like every game is Game 7 and I’m scoreboard watching Tampa Bay and Baltimore. Things have unraveled quickly. I don’t think I will truly be nervous until the lead gets to two games (if it ever gets there), but the current state of the Yankees is enough to cause for a test of the emergency broadcast system.

With a month to go, what is your take on the state of the Yankees and how worried are you of the possibility of a one-game playoff, if you’re worried at all?

Strasser: The Yankees are an enigma. I have never seen a club traverse the spectrum of success quite like this year’s team. There are points throughout the course of the season when they coast through series after series with what seems to be zero resistance. And then you have the stretches of poor play when the Yankee offense channels its inner Astros and the lineup looks anemic at the plate. The Yankees are a team built to crush mediocrity. Aside from the game’s top-shelf arms, along with any double-A pitcher lucky enough to make his debut in the Bronx, the Yankees are a near-sure bet to put up at least five or six runs on any given night. But what happens when they run into the buzz saw arms of the Verlanders and Weavers of the league? Well, we’ve all seen it a million times. How many 4-1 or 6-2 losses can we take?

As demonstrated the other night in Cleveland, the Yankees live and die with the home run. In a game where they let myriad scoring opportunities slip through their fingers against Indians pitcher, Corey Kluber, they ended up pulling out the win with a late two-run home run by Swisher. I’ve never been mad about a Yankee win, but I’d be lying if I said that one didn’t infuriate me. The ball that Swisher hit not only cleared the right-field wall, but the team from getting questioned about their inability to manufacture runs as well. The big blast consistently overshadows the offensive woes. This is great for the regular season, but aces on playoff teams don’t generally give up the long ball. The Yankees don’t move the runners, they don’t play small ball, and they don’t hit in the clutch. So where does that leave them? A couple games behind the best record in the AL. It’s both perplexing and frustrating how a team can look so good on paper, but instill a much lower level of confidence on the field.

So you ask me how nervous I am for a potential one-game playoff? Let’s put it this way- I’m letting my fingernails grow out until that day so I have plenty to pick for all nine innings. My cuticles will look like a teen slasher horror movie by the sixth. It all depends on the pitching match up, but anything can happen. And that’s what scares me. Given the roster (and the payroll), the Yankees should have the edge over any team, but as was stated in Moneyball, statistics go out the window when it comes to one game. For the Yankees to have any sort of success in this year’s playoff run, it will come from one or two guys getting hot at the right time circa 2009 with A Rod and Matsui. And if that doesn’t happen, well, let’s hope for a relevant Jets team, because it will be yet another early round exit for the pinstripes.

Keefe: You said it all depends on the pitching matchup, but we shouldn’t worry because a wise man once told me in a podcast that “Ivan Nova will become a big-game pitcher.” Actually that wasn’t a wise man … it was you.

OK, maybe that’s a low-blow, but I don’t think it is since you did disregard Hiroki Kuroda, who I talked up on that same podcast and now he’s become the Yankees’ best pitcher. Before we go any further, I think you owe No. 18 an apology.

(This is ne waiting for your apology…)

Let’s continue and let’s say the Yankees don’t completely fall apart between now and Game 162 and reach the ALDS and that Andy Pettitte returns and is healthy enough to pitch in the postseason. Who’s pitching Games 1, 2 and 3? Hopefully they don’t need a Game 4 starter, but eff it, let’s put a Game 4 starter in there too. And I know we have talked about it before, but I think it’s important for an update since it changes all the time.

I’m going with CC Sabathia, Andy Pettitte, Hiroki Kuroda and then … umm … hmm … uhh … I guess … Phil Hughes? I would love to say David Phelps there, but we both know that’s not going to happen, and I don’t want Freddy Garcia anywhere near a playoff game again let alone on the postseason roster.

Strasser: Yeah, so I put myself out there with a bold prediction. Strasser took a shot, and you know what, Strasser missed. But at least I’m in the game. You’re sitting over there on the sidelines observing and reporting while I’m risking my reputation on a daily basis. You’re the douche bag with the combover in Good Will Hunting and I’m Matt Damon. I may be serving your fries on the way to your ski trip, but at least I’m original. So enjoy your bland perspective of watching and relaying, while I take a leap of faith and throw my heart into something I believe. I’d rather falsely predict something with 100% conviction than sit in the shadows and play it safe any day. I dare to dream, Neil. I dare to dream.

The postseason rotation depends entirely on the situation. It’s CC first, and then either Kuroda or Pettitte. If CC loses game 1 for instance, assuming a healthy Pettitte, I want Andy on the mound. He’s a big-game pitcher and going down 0-2 is a death sentence. I do owe Kuroda an apology, and I have gained a lot of faith in him, but the playoffs are a different world.

It also depends on the breakdown of home and away. It’s no secret that Kuroda is a better pitcher at the Stadium. That plays into rotation decisions, as well. Ask me this question when the ALDS schedule is set, and I’ll have a more definitive answer for you. Until then, Nova4Life.

Keefe: Being called the scumbag in the Harvard bar in Good Will Hunting is as bad as it gets, so move over “me wanting Ubaldo Jimenez last year” there’s a new low point in my life. And I don’t think it was a bold prediction or anything that out there since Nova did win Game 1 of the ALDS last year before getting pulled early in Game 5. So let’s hold patting yourself on the back for a second there. It’s not like you told me that CC Sabathia would go on the DL twice and Andy Pettitte and Alex Rodriguez would also hit the DL and Mariano Rivera and Brett Gardner would be out for the year and the Yankees would still be in first in the division. That would be something to be proud of.

The Yankees are in a weird spot with the looming luxury tax penalties. It seemed like a foregone conclusion that they would sign Robinson Cano and Curtis Granderson to long-term deals and let Nick Swisher walk away. But a funny thing happened on a way to that plan. Actually, it’s not funny. What happened is Granderson has become Adam Dunn-like and Swisher has carried the team offensively through August. (Granderson is still a great defender while I don’t trust Swisher on routine plays.) Now there is talk that Swisher wants Jayson Werth’s $126 million, which is unlikely, but he will at least get a solid deal given his performance this year and the weak free agent market.

It’s no secret that I’m not that big of a Nick Swisher fan, if I’m one at all, which I don’t think I am. I know it will all come down to what he does in October, which is likely nothing, but it seems more and more likely that Swisher and his phony personality and his disgusting arguments on called third strikes might not only be back in the Bronx for 2013, but maybe a few years after. And it doesn’t help that the Red Sox’ impending interest in him will likely drive his price up and force the Yankees to make a play for him.

If Nicky Swish (sorry to go John Sterling on you) finally hits in the postseason and the Yankees make a long run, that’s one thing. But if he fails to hit elite pitching for the fourth straight postseason I don’t want to see No. 33 in right field in 2013 unless the new right fielder also wants to wear No. 33.

Strasser: I like the idea of Swisher. What does that mean? Well, this. Fake or not, he helps the clubhouse – one that up until his arrival in 2009, had been publicly documented as stiff and stale. His boisterous personality is good for the team and even better for the fans. That being said, he doesn’t really do it for me on the field. Outside of this year, which so coincidentally happens to be a contract year, he hasn’t been anything special in my opinion. He targets the short porch far too frequently, often times resulting in a pop out to short when a ground ball to second would have moved the runner over.

If the Yankees commit the amount of money Swisher will want, and the basic fundamentals of supply and demand will allow, it will result in an overpaid outfielder clogging a spot that could be used for future acquisitions. I love his on-base percentage, I love his occasional power, but I don’t love his price tag. Let him walk.

Keefe: There’s going to come a time in October when Joe Girardi decides, “Hey, these people paid to come see me manage and insert myself into this game and not to see the players on the field” and he will likely turn to Clay Rapada or Cody Eppley to get a big out. Let’s just hope they get that big out.

The bullpen pecking order is all out of whack right now aside from Rafael Soriano and David Robertson. I think Boone Logan is probably viewed as the third-best reliever (that feels weird even thinking about let alone typing) and then it’s a mess between Cody Eppley, Clay Rapada and whoever that guy wearing No. 62 and pretending to be Joba Chamberlain is. I really only trust David Robertson out there even though Soriano has been great, and I don’t want the other three putting their hands on the game. Actually there might be one guy I don’t mind.

For some reason and I can’t explain this, I still have this thing about Joba in that I trust him. Or I want to trust him. When I see him out there I have flashbacks of the summer of 2007 and unhittable fastballs and devastating sliders. I see fist pumps and scoreless innings. In reality, he is basically Chad Qualls right now (actually he’s statistically worse). This pains me and I don’t want it to be like this, but the guy is also coming back from elbow surgery, having his appendix removed and a brutal ankle injury. I think he will find it, I just don’t know when.

Strasser: I’m pretty much in agreement with you on the bullpen issue. Robertson I trust, and Soriano I’m warming up to. Joba will hopefully come around because like you said, I want to trust him. I want to remember being at the first game he ever pitched in at the stadium (Section 434B … I splurged) and seeing the Bronx sky erupt with amazement at the spectacle we had all just witnessed. But is that guy still there, or are we just reaching for something that doesn’t exist like an image popping off the screen in a 3D movie? You know those a-holes swiping at the air in front of them … are we those a-holes, Neil?

You’re leaving out one incredibly important detail as far as playoff bullpen pitching goes. One man, three syllables: David Phelps. I loved this guy in the bullpen earlier in the season, and I like what I’m seeing from him as a starter. Throwing him back in the bullpen for a late September push and on into October could be that bridge the Yankees need to get to Robertson and Soriano.

Keefe: I forgot about your man crush on David Phelps and I hate to break it to you, but I think it’s a love triangle. That’s right, I’m joining this party, so I hope there’s room for three. I have loved everything Phelps has done for this team, and if he isn’t given a postseason start (which he very well could if he continues to impress and dominate) then he will be a huge addition to the bullpen.

You have told me that Raul Ibanez is your sleeper pick to be huge for the Yankees in the postseason, and I’m onboard with that decision. Ibanez has that “thing” about him that exudes confidence especially when the at-bats are the biggest the setting is most important. Granted, we could both be way off and he could have a Swisher-like 2-for-15 ALDS and the Yankees could be home in five games, but let’s just hope that’s not the case.

The other guy I think is going to be huge in October is Ichiro because of who he is and what he wanted out of going to New York to win and getting out of Seattle, the only place he ever knew in the majors. Ichiro hasn’t played in the postseason since Game 5 of the 2001 ALCS on the other side of the River Ave. Now he has a chance to chase that elusive championship, pick up the one thing missing in a Hall of Fame career that boasts a Rookie of the Year, MVP, batting titles, single-season hits records, Gold Gloves and All-Star Games, and a chance to earn a multiyear deal at the end of the season.

Why do you think Ibanez will be big in the postseason and what are you thoughts on Ichiro returning to October?

Strasser: There’s something about Raul Ibanez. He’s got that look. It’s a combination of focus, clutch, and ugly. The first two are going to be huge in October. Well, huge in my mind at least. In my mind, he has already hit two of those majestic moonshots to right in the first game of the ALDS. Okay, that may be a bit hopeful, but I really do get that vibe from him. That oddly unexplainable Jeterian vibe. But hey, I could be wrong. It’s happened before … cough … Nova … cough.

As far as Ichiro goes, I see him doing a lot of the little things for us in the playoffs. I’m not gonna sit here as a delusional Yankee homer and tell you that he’s going to rediscover his MVP form and hit .450 in the ALDS, but I do think he can provide some important benefits for the team. His baseball instincts are great, and sometimes a playoff win and the subsequent advancement to the next series can come down to one play. Whether it’s an astounding defensive play, some 2009 WS Damon-esque base running, or some other sort of contribution, I could see Ichiro having one or two “Yankee moments” in October.

My final prediction for the playoffs revolves around one of the most inconsistent cold weather bats in the league. No. 24 in your program and probably right around that number in our hearts, Robinson Cano has the potential to carry the Yankees to a ring. He’s just nonchalant enough to sleepwalk through a postseason line of .390 with eight home runs and 21 RBIs.

Keefe: Everyone keeps asking me if the Yankees can win the World Series, and I keep telling these people that I think they can. Right now there’s isn’t one team that really stands out in the AL, but if Pettitte returns healthy then a rotation of CC Sabathia, Andy Pettitte and Hiroki Kuroda is as good as any 1-2-3 punch this postseason.

But to win the World Series it’s going to take winning the ALDS first (and hopefully not the one-game playoff first). I think the Yankees’ best chance of advancing would be if the Orioles make the one-game playoff and win it. The Yankees have loved playing in Camden Yards since it opened and no matter the year or roster turnover, the Yankees continue to win there, and with the first games of the division series on the road, that’s a big deal. I don’t want to see the Rays since the Yankees can’t win at the Trop anymore, or the Tigers since they seem to have our number or the White Sox since the Yankees had enough trouble winning a game there last week, forget October. Even the A’s scare me with their starting pitching and the idea of going 3,000 miles for the first two games of the ALDS isn’t exactly enticing. Give me Baltimore!

Strasser: The best option for the Yankees to play in the ALDS is the not-Angels. I think the Yankees can really expose some of the weaknesses of the not-Angels and capitalize on their shortcomings. Seriously though, the one team I’m terrified of is the Angels. I have no idea why they aren’t running away with the West, but if they get into the playoffs, look out. Mike Trout is just young and naive enough to not even realize that he’s having this historic season that could easily carry into October. They are the one team in the AL I most certainly don’t want to face.

To be honest, there isn’t one team that I would sign up to play right now. If anything, it would be the Rangers and their mediocre pitching staff, but we all know what can happen when Josh Hamilton or Nelson Cruz gets hot. Still, if I had to choose, I’ll take a matchup with the Rangers and their antler nonsense.

As much as I bash the Yankees’ deficiencies, I think they will hang on to win the division. Pettitte and A-Rod are coming back, CC looks sharp after his 12th DL stint of the year and Kuroda continues to mock me. I don’t think Tampa has the offense and I’m still not sold on Baltimore, despite their success this season. I also hate Buck Showalter and refuse to give him any credit, but the O’s are a good team. Another scary group of inexperienced guys playing above their heads. Is “above their heads” an expression? If not, it is now.

Keefe: You want to play the Rangers? In real life? I don’t think I can even given you a chance to respond to this after that.

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Aug 23, 2012

Scorecard Memory: First Hawaiian Shirt Night in the Bleachers

Sheriff Tom goes back to August 17, 2001 in Section 39 of Yankee Stadium for a Yankees-Mariners game and the debut of Hawaiian Shirt Night in the bleachers.

This is a recurring series of recollections, where I will be marching though my old scorecards from my halcyon days in good old Section 39 of the Yankee Stadium bleachers. You’re invited to join me. Please bring beer.

Friday, August 17, 2001: Yankees host the Seattle Mariners.

Ah, Hawaiian Shirt Night. August means a lot of things in the Yankee Stadium bleachers including complaints about how it’s too hot, proposed pitching rotations for the inevitable playoff action and a night when a couple of dozen bleacher fans saunter to their seats in loud tropical wear. Here is today’s history lesson.

It had been weeks in the planning, as we were always looking for new and dumb things to do out there, but the fruits of our labor finally came to fruition as the first Hawaiian Shirt night commenced in Section 39, a full 11 years ago, on August 17th, 2001. My treasured scorecard from this evening is currently missing in action, which actually alarms me to no end, but I safeguarded a number of notes from this landmark event on an old bleacher message board and can put together this puzzle and recall this night, as I sip a tropical drink at my computer at 2:30 in the afternoon to keep with the theme.

A lot of the initial partakes actually showed up that night with tropical garb and a sense of trepidation, thinking it was all an elaborate gag on them, and they would be the only ones while the rest of us laughed. Feelings of joy, relief and good cheer were sure to spark in them when they noticed as they strolled up to the gates of Yancey Park across from the Stadium for some hot pregame action a dozen guys, beers in bags, bedecked in the ugliest collection of shirts since the 1970s Houston Astros. Palm trees, tropical drinks, boats, sand dunes. For some reason our buddy, 41, wore a shirt that had cars on it, but knowing him it could’ve been worse. It could have been the band KISS on the shirt. Walkman John, missing the point a bit, had an Oriental theme going on, though the colors were acceptable. Bald Ray was wearing a mesh Hawaiian shirt, something I had never even heard of. “Fat Rak” Scott topped all on this inaugural effort with a tropical shirt blasting with color, complete with nubile women playing golf on it. In one of the trivial oddities of the time “Mr. Make It Happen” Phil and Israeli Joe had the exact same shirt on. This was unusual because everyone who went to buy a shirt that summer and every summer could pick from literally hundreds of choices on every rack, and these two had a personal beef simmering at the time, so this was big news in our little world.

Strolling in that night we saw one of the legendary security grumps, “Old Man 200” ensconced by the rail. He got this monicker from wearing a navy blue cap with a big “200” on it for whatever reason (not the most stylish of headwear). Well, he actually didn’t wear “200” often since the number seemed to change without reason, but his dislike for our antics never did. On this night he was sporting No. 175. “Way to slide 25 spots!” we hollered in friendly greeting. He got me back an inning later, accusing me of “misdirecting people” who could not find their seats, only to spark a feisty exchange with Queen Bee Tina, who was in fine form and fighting with everyone like she did in my early days out there. Another well-known Creature of lore, Crazy Dave, was roaming around passing out photos he had taken of the group throughout the season, and was promptly dubbed “Johnny Photoseed.”

Just about 30 Creatures went with the theme that night, which oddly has remained one of the higher turnouts! This night is one of those that is derided by the grumpy (aside from me), those who don’t like all the bells and whistles and those who think that attire simply looks dumb. Ignorant Evan added to the fanfaronade by handing out lei’s, while MetsSuckBalls waved around the same Tiki statue that screwed with the Brady Bunch on those classic television episodes. Bald Vinny proudly proclaimed he had his “hula girl boxers” on and showed them proudly to people as early as his 4 train ride up to the Stadium.

Basically, according to my notes, these names will go on in posterity as participating on this landmark night (read through for a romp through memory lane and see who you can pick out of a lineup): Uptown Mike, “Mr. Make it Happen” Phil, Walkman John, Midget Mike, Big Tone Capone, Bald Vinny, Bald Ray, Milton the Cowbell King, 41, “POS” Diggity Dan, Navy Tommy, two guys I really didn’t know, me, Justin, MetsSuckBalls, Cuban Monica, Felix, Fat Rak and his friend Paul, Ignorant Evan, Water Girl Debbie, X-Pac Kenny, Kwik, Israeli Joe, Frankie Vybe, Laura, Rachel and Stacey. Of all people, Junior missed the boat on this one, although he seemed to wear a tropical shirt every other night he showed up. Big D also didn’t wear one, but I was too afraid to ask him why. And, of course, in one of the more amusing bon mots in bleacher lore, Mike “Donahuge” was not there even though this whole thing was pretty much his idea along with mine. Ironically enough, he was on the beach in Florida  (possibly posing for pics from whale watchers back there in his now fondly remembered heavier days), but the show must go on, and without him it did.

The shirts themselves went over as expected from just about everyone else in the bleachers as they were met with disgust. I went over to Section 37 to rap with chicks and the consensus over there was that Midget Mike had the worst one going, a red-based anagram of putridity. My shirt was a pale orange hue, but had met my initial goal going in. Along with the requisite water and boats, my shirt featured some native folk climbing trees hanging with coconuts. Some were featured on the shirt holding this prized booty aloft with enthusiasm not even shown by champions holding aloft the Stanley Cup. One native was sitting behind a mound of coconuts, which looked more like a drum set. “Check out the guy rocking the kit!” someone shouted with glee as they pointed at my ugly shirt.

Late in the game the girls in 37 pointed out that one of the natives on my shirt, standing in a flimsy looking boat, had a strange protrusion extending from his shadowed self, and upon closer examination I must admit I managed to get a Hawaiian shirt for this event featuring a guy on a sailboat sporting a rampant boner.

Let’s salvage some funny notes from this one, shall we. I knew this was going to be “one of those nights” when the first thing I noticed when I walked up was someone eating corn on the cob.  While discussing our shirts and how we procured these fine duds, someone mentioned a magical bodega-ish sort of place where you could get “a Hawaiian shirt, a dish of beans and rice, and an umbrella all in the same place!” Quite the fantasyland! Early on a pack of nerdy guys walked up and Midget Mike snarled, “Finish your math problems later and find your seat!” Soon after, Big Nose Larry sauntered over, extended his hand to little Mike and said, “Whats up, can I squash you like a grape?” Junior hopped up and yelled at Jeter as he came to the plate, “Come on, pretty boy, get a hit!” and the ever-surly Mike loudly added, “Hey, sorry you can’t order champagne out there!”

Some dopey fan had a plastic horn and was bleating along and annoying any and all. Head security honcho Sean (a dead ringer for Honeymooner’s era Jackie Gleason) stomped up to take the offending instrument away. As he walked the offending and now crumpled horn out with him people shouted, “Play us a tune, Sean!” to no avail.

Meanwhile, Grover was as usual the life of the party, pawing through his oddball collection of Bazooka Joe comics with all the jokes in Israeli. For some reason a “USA! USA! USA!” chant kicked off to which Grover hollered, “Booooo! We should have lost the Cold War!”

Some oddball stuff was going on over on the scoreboard, as Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly was asking Bad News Bears trivia on there. A Mickey Mantle tribute video played,with the background music of Toni Basil’s “Hey Mickie!” which was sorta sketchy. I loved Mantle, but I would rather have seen Basil in the cheerleader costume she sported in her music video that night up there. To top it off, San Antonio native and bullpen stalwart Randy Choate had to actually answer a dumb question about the Alamo some doofy fan sent in on the scoreboard. I’m not sure what Choate said in response, but I’d imagine it was something like, “Hey, I didn’t shoot anyone.”

Junior was feeling very vibrant, hopping up in the air every time a Yankee hurler got to two strikes, which was seemingly every hitter. It got so annoying he was promptly dubbed a “Jack-off in the Box.” And to top it all off, I noted an overzealous fan came over, asked me to take a pic with him and said, “You’re the best! I’m a huge fan of the Tom drum! Whats your name again?” Um, alrighty then!

I remember for years recalling the game that night “nondescript,” but that’s not totally fair. The Yankees shut out the Mariners 4-0, behind seven strong by Mike Mussina. After Mike Stanton ducked in and out, Ramiro Mendoza locked it down with his fifth save on the season. One Paul Abbott took the L for Seattle, which amazingly brought his record down to 12-3 (WTF?) The Tankees did all their damage in his four innings of work and this included taters from Alfonso Soriano, Derek Jeter and Shane Spencer. In another fun note, current Yankee Icihro Suzuki was nailed attempting to steal, which I’m sure was met with joy.

54, 616 were on hand that night, with approximately 54,586 not in Hawaiian shirts. The game clocked in at 2:51, which is actually short for the usually notoriously long Friday night games we are all accustomed to. Your umpires on the evening were Matt Hollowell (HP), Jeff Nelson (1B), the life-saver and perfect game shatterer Jim Joyce (2B) and Tim Timmons (3B).

So yes, this is a tradition that has lived on for over a decade now. And yes, it’s a tradition that will never die. Next Friday, August 31, look for that cluster of tropical color in the bleachers in and around section 203, as the mantle for organizing this thing and fighting the establishment has gone to our good friend Rocky as it lives on. I will indeed be in there, making merry, but probably not until the fourth inning. Beer is cheaper outside than it is inside!

Aloha!

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